Friday, June 15, 2007

Get Out Of Your Way!

Want to get back to the confident and self-fulfilled person you used to be? Wondering how you’re going to be a better mom, a better spouse, or a better employee? If you are stuck in the muck and mire of a situation that is wearing you down, and as a result you are feeling anxious, depressed, or hopeless, you might be sabotaging your own efforts to get unstuck.

Yes, what I’m saying is, it’s your fault!

Wait, wait! Before you press the delete button on this email, hear me out. Most of us sabotage our efforts to move forward without realizing it. We are on autopilot. Busy with the everydayness of life: going to work, caring for the kids, trying to make quota…you get the picture. We clutter our mind and life with “have to’s.” If you’re like most people, you have great intentions about moving forward, improving your business, strengthening your relationship or being a better parent. But if you aren’t doing or getting what you want from your life, there is a reason, and plain and simple, you need to get out of your own way.

“It’s not you, it’s me"

It is easier to blame our boss, our spouse, our kids, our cat, our schedule, or anything else we can think of, on our problems. But by blaming external factors for what is happening in our lives we make ourselves powerless. We can’t create the change needed to get unstuck. How can you have the life you want if you are completely out of control? Sure, some things are not within your power, but everything you think, feel and do, is all yours.

Taking responsibility for your own life can sometimes be a difficult endeavor. However, it is important to know that you are in the driver’s seat. You have choices! You are in control of your life, good and bad. Therefore, no matter what is happening in your life, whether you feel stuck in a dead end job, or struggling to make your marriage work. You have the choice and the responsibility to choose change. You owe it to yourself.

It’s all in your head…

There is one thing you can start doing today that will help you get started. You must take inventory of your mindset. Is your dominating thinking pattern one of scarcity or one of abundance? A scarcity mindset means focusing on what you DON’T have as opposed to what you DO have, resulting in feeling hopeless, lonely, and powerless. Think about it. Do you find yourself complaining on a regular basis about what you don’t want, don’t have, and can’t have? Are those around you pretty negative?

With an abundant mindset you feel excited and powerful, with choices. You are able to focus on the overflowing resources or opportunities. You feel empowered and confident that you have more than enough. There are no limits to what you can achieve, have, or dream. An abundant mindset allows your inner strengths and passions to come to the surface without self-limiting patterns, such as skepticism, fear, and doubt getting in the way.

Hey, Shifty

You can start changing today by shifting your mindset from scarcity to abundance. Engage in positive thinking. Ok, ok, I know you’ve heard this before. I know it’s very cliché. But I beg the question: Are you getting what you want from your life, or aren’t you? Because if you’re not, I bet you’re willing to try just about anything. Making that mindset shift It is actually the key to changing your life. Start changing your mindset by deliberating planting thoughts of choice, confidence and joy. By creating a dominating thinking pattern that reflects abundance you will be creating a new reality. You will naturally and effortlessly become unstuck.

By Diana Guintu, M.Ed.Co-Founder of I Choose ChangeCounselor and Coach
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